Definition

Noun: A display of affection that is not genuine, but is motivated by a desire for personal gain, typically for food, treats, or other material benefits. It implies the affection is a pretense used to get something from the person showing it.

Usage

This term is often used to describe the behavior of pets, especially cats and dogs, who become affectionate when they want food. It can also be applied humorously to people, particularly children, who are nice to someone because they want a gift or favor.

Examples

• The dog follows me around only at dinner time; it's pure cupboard love.
• Don't be fooled by his sudden friendliness—it's just cupboard love because he knows you baked cookies.
• My niece gives me hugs, but I suspect it's cupboard love for the toys I bring.

Advanced Usage

• The concept highlights the instrumental nature of the affection, where the end goal (getting something) is more important than the relationship itself.
• It is often used in a light-hearted, teasing manner rather than as a serious accusation of manipulation.

Variants and Related Words

• Feigned affection: (Phrase) Pretended or false affection. This is a more formal synonym.
• Ulterior motive: (Phrase) A hidden reason for doing something. While broader, it can describe the selfish intent behind "cupboard love."

Synonyms

• Calculated affection
• Self-serving affection
• Feigned fondness

Idioms and Related Phrases

• Butter someone up: To be very nice to someone so they will do what you want.
  • He's just buttering you up because he wants to borrow the car.
• Fair-weather friend: A person who is only a friend when circumstances are pleasant or beneficial.
  • She only calls when she needs help; she's a real fair-weather friend.

Noun

1. a show of affection motivated by selfishness