Definition

1. Interrogative phrase:
   • How can one bear to...? / How can one have the heart to...?: Expresses a strong sense of moral or emotional difficulty in accepting or performing an action, often implying it is inconsiderate, cruel, or ungrateful. It questions the conscience of the subject.
   • Why would one...? (with a tone of reproach): Used to question the justification or sensibility of an action that seems wrong or hurtful.

Usage Examples

• Interrogative phrase:
  • Đối xử với cha mẹ như thế sao đành? (How can one have the heart to treat one's parents like that?)
  • Bỏ rơi con vật nhỏ bé ấy sao đành? (How can you bear to abandon that tiny animal?)
  • Thấy bạn gặp khó khăn mà sao đành quay mặt làm ngơ? (Seeing your friend in trouble, how could you turn a blind eye?)

Advanced Usage

• "Làm sao đành lòng...": A more explicit and common variant meaning "How can one bring oneself to... / How can one bear the thought of...".
  • Làm sao đành lòng rời xa quê hương? (How can one bear to leave one's homeland?)
• Used in poetic or emotional contexts to express deep internal conflict or sorrow about a necessary but painful decision.
  • Sao đành chia tay, nhưng hoàn cảnh buộc phải thế. (How could I bear to say goodbye, but circumstances force it.)

Variants and Related Words

• Sao nỡ: A very close synonym, also meaning "how can one have the heart to". It is often interchangeable with "sao đành".
  • Sao nỡ từ chối lời cầu xin của em? (How could I refuse your plea?)
• Đành lòng: (Verb phrase) To resign oneself to, to accept (often reluctantly). It is the affirmative state that "sao đành" questions.
  • Tôi không đành lòng bỏ nó lại một mình. (I couldn't bring myself to leave it alone.)

Synonyms

• Sao có thể... (mà không áy náy): How can one... (without remorse)?
• Lẽ nào lại...: Could it really be that...? (expressing disbelief about an action).

Related Idioms and Phrases

• "Sao đành đoạn tuyệt": How can one bear to sever ties/cut off completely?
  • Mấy chục năm tình nghĩa, sao đành đoạn tuyệt? (With decades of affection, how can you bear to cut ties?)
• The phrase often carries an implicit cultural expectation of filial piety ("hiếu thảo"), compassion ("tình thương"), or duty ("nghĩa vụ").

1. how can one tolerate, why.?